“Don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.”

I just saw this quote online and it really resonated with me today. I truly believe so many people find the thought of “healthy living” so daunting they don’t even know where to start. They think they have to immediately overhaul their lifestyle – following a religiously paleo diet and hitting the gym every single day.

Nothing could be further from the truth! Start today. With baby steps. Do one small thing right now. Go for a walk. Do some crunches while watching the news. Hold a plank pose for 30 seconds while you are already on the floor. Isn’t that more than did yesterday?

On the food front, buy some amazing fall apples instead of your usual cookies. Throw out the rest of that bag of chips calling to you from your kitchen. Try a healthy new pumpkin dessert recipe vs. your usual fat and sugar laden treat.

And things NOT to do? Do not look at the person next to you on the treadmill. Do not covet your neighbor’s perfect crow pose in yoga class. Do not feel guilt when you see someone’s shopping cart filled with kale and quinoa. Most importantly, do not tell yourself that wellness is all or nothing. Find that happy gray zone when it comes to your personal wellness. Make one or two small changes that YOU can accomplish TODAY.

Be well.

Your Future Self

If you are a Pinterest fan like I am, you have likely come across plenty of inspirational quotes and sayings in your time spent on this fabulous site. One of the best I have seen – one I am trying to make a personal mantra – is “Do something today your future self with thank you for.”

Wow, where to start? This pearl of wisdom could be applied to so many areas of my life….physical health, mental wellbeing, family life, finances, spirituality…the list could go on and on. I am easily overwhelmed thinking about the many areas of my life that could use some attention and improvement. 

The beauty of this saying is the word “one.” Surely, I can manage to do ONE thing today, right? A few things that immediately come to mind are to schedule my mammogram, meditate for a few minutes, call that friend who needs a pick-me-up (because that may be me someday!), try to let go of an old grudge, cook a healthful meal, go for a brief walk before getting the kids, etc.

Taken as a whole, this list is very daunting. But if I can get in the habit of just tackling one thing each day, I will not only have a sense of accomplishment, but over time, I will form new habits supporting better health and wellness. Small changes in our routines and thoughts are what eventually lead to big life improvements.

So what is YOUR one thing for today?

Be well.

Listening to your Body

In just about every yoga class that I lead, I say some variation of these words: “Listen to your body. Only do what feels right and good today.” I provide my students with examples  --  “Perhaps today is a day we take more rest.” Or alternatively, “Maybe today is a day we are full of energy and can challenge ourselves in a new way.” I encourage students to modify their poses and practice to fit their needs for that day, remembering that every time we come to the mat is a unique experience.

It is fairly easy to feel when something is “off” or when we are out of alignment in our yoga practice. If a knee slips past the ankle, for example, we most likely feel an immediate twinge and use that pain as a signal to shift our weight back. Or if we normally can bind in a pose but are unable to today, we know our shoulders may be tighter than usual.  When our bodies provide such cues, we listen. We modify the pose, we take a rest, or we scale back.

Off the mat, it can be much harder to listen to these cues from our bodies and make adjustments. Perhaps there are situations in our lives that are causing us stress or anxiety. Is a certain person is sapping all of our energy? Is our work-life balance tilting greatly in favor of work? Does a significant change have us feeling anxious about the future? Any of these situations can manifest themselves physically – tight shoulders and necks, clenched teeth and jaws, exhaustion from too many commitments, and more. Yet how often do we ignore these physical cues and forge on without complaint?

Next time your body sends you a physical cue, I’d encourage you to stop and think about what it means and its source, be it a person or situation. Once you have identified the root cause, think about what adjustment or modification you can make to heed the cue. For example -- do your shoulders automatically tense up to your ears when you encounter a certain person? If so, perhaps it is time to think about ways you can limit your interactions with him or her. Is there a certain time of day you tend to get anxious at work? If so, perhaps a brisk walk can help shake off some of the anxiety.

As I close my classes, I always say, “Let’s strive to be as good to ourselves off the mats as we are here on our mats.” Easier said than done, for sure, but a goal well worth the effort.

Be well.

Accountability

Recently, I finished a course on life coaching for yoga instructors, focused on taking the practice of yoga “off the mat and into life.” It was a great class, chock full of thought-provoking discussions, exercises, and readings. One of the class requirements was to do a set number of practice coaching sessions on willing participants, following the prescribed “coaching model.”

I was very nervous to dip my toes in the coaching waters for a variety of reasons. However, I forged ahead and in the end, I had many great sessions. I learned a tremendous amount about what struggles my friends and students are facing on the health and wellness front. Finding time to exercise, emotional eating, and health concerns were common themes. In the sessions, I helped these clients narrow the focus of their overarching issues and develop some short-term action items to help move them forward towards their wellness goals.

I had some sort of follow-up session, either in person or via email, with each client. A common theme in all of these follow-up communications was accountability. Several women shared that knowing that I would be checking in on their progress, they were truly motivated to work on their action items. Trigger foods were removed from the house, appointments were made, food logs were started, exercise schedules were created and followed, and more.

It was very gratifying to see the progress these women made in a relatively short amount of time. Often, just pausing to think about our goals (wellness or otherwise), write them down, and then share them with someone who will support your efforts, can spur us into action and subsequent success. And very often, this initial success inspires us to work even harder.

This is not to say we all need to go hire a coach to help us work towards our health and wellness goals. I do think it is essential to have a partner or support system helping you along the way. Is there a friend you can partner with to do weekly check-ins on your fitness goals? Perhaps you can explore an online community to support your weight loss efforts. Consider enlisting your spouse to check in with you during your “stress eating” hours. Think outside the box and aim to be accountable to someone other than yourself.

Be well.

My Top Five: Self-Care

This quote landed in my inbox recently and got me thinking…

“Self-care is not self-indulgence. Self-care is self-respect.” – Trish Allen

For almost two years now, I have volunteered for Postpartum Support Virginia (PSVa), helping struggling new mothers in the throes of postpartum depression and anxiety (PPD/PPA). In our meetings and literature, we call the PPD/PPA recovery process “the path to wellness.” I just love this term and its imagery. It reminds us that there is no quick fix to achieve instant wellness or perfect mental health. Achieving good health (physical and mental) and wellness is indeed a journey, rather than an end result.

A key component of this path to wellness is “self-care,” which, for new moms, includes enough sleep (five uninterrupted hours being key), time alone, exercise, journaling, etc.

I recently posted about “what fills your cup?” – doing more of the things that bring joy to our lives. “Cup-filling” activities are, in my mind, the icing on the cake. Self-care is the basic cake recipe – the flour, sugar, eggs, butter, etc. It is the day-to-day routine that keeps us happy, healthy and (mostly) sane.

Working with these women prompted me to think about my own self-care. I am so glad I did. It is a lovely exercise to undertake, one that has helped me tremendously through some stressful times. So without further ado, here are my top five self-care essentials:

·    Exercise. Daily movement is an absolute must to clear my head, relieve stress, and also do some serious thinking. For me, I find yoga and running to be the best combination.

·    Sleep. I sleep about seven hours at night and grab any nap opportunity I can. I can get by on less evening sleep but it is not always pretty. I am not someone that can sleep in (I am well-known for my 5:30am emails!) but I am a champion napper. If my schedule allows, I rest after lunch. Even a ten-minute catnap helps me tremendously.

·    Alone Time. While I am a very social person, I also require a lot of alone time – especially first thing in the morning. I require (1) coffee and (2) time to check email and get my head on straight before I can communicate with my husband or kids.

·    Feeling and Looking My Best. It may sound vain, but I feel so much better if I keep up my appearance – toenails painted (being a yoga instructor, lots of people see my bare feet!), eyebrows tamed, and no visible grays. I also am very diligent about seeing my chiropractor and/or favorite masseuse if my body is not keeping up with my active lifestyle.

·    Delicious and (mostly) Healthful Food. I tend to eat very healthfully. I don’t like big, heavy meals that make me overly full and sleepy. I eat a lot of fruits and vegetables, lean protein, whole grains, and low-fat dairy. That said, I also really enjoy cooking, trying new recipes (especially desserts), entertaining, and having my Friday night “wine time.” So I strive to eat as well as possible when I can, and enjoy some of my favorite indulgences along the way.

So there you have it – my wellness formula. Do I always get enough sleep and have perfect toes? Definitely not. Do I use this list as an outline for staying happy, healthy, and sane? Absolutely.

I often say in my yoga classes, “We MUST be taking care of ourselves so that we can take care of others and do all the things we want (and need) to do in our lives.” It is never self-indulgent to properly care for yourself. If we do not care for ourselves, we are more likely to get sick, become fatigued, etc. What good are we to our families, friends, and coworkers if we are sick in bed or cranky with exhaustion? So please try to shed any guilt you may have about your self-care. Think of it as investment in your overall wellness.

Consider taking ten minutes to make your self-care top five list. I promise you will be glad you did.

Be well.

‘Tis the Season

Mid-January. The Christmas tree is down and the decorations are in the attic (right?). That means ‘tis the season for New Year’s Resolutions. While I do tend to find myself in a little post-holiday funk every January, I do appreciate this time of year for the “blank slate” it presents. It is the perfect time for some self-reflection and goal-setting for the year ahead.

For many of us, we have resolved to eat better, exercise more, or perhaps kick that unhealthy habit once and for all. Sound familiar? As a yoga instructor, I see resolutions in action every January – classes are packed and students are buying passes so they feel committed to coming regularly.

However, come February, the yoga business settles back into its more regular flow. Have you also found that your previous resolutions have fallen away by February? Have you wondered how this year can be different?

It’s a simple saying but very true – old ways won’t open new doors.

Let’s look at an example. Maybe in the past you have resolved to hit the gym every day before work at 6 am. Did this resolution ever last more than a week or two? Perhaps this year, take a moment to think why it did not. Is the gym the last place you want to be on a cold, dark winter morning? Then it is time to tell yourself a new story about exercising.

What would get you moving this year? Perhaps you’d be more motivated if you knew a friend was meeting you at the gym. Maybe you’d rather go for a walk rather than be indoors. Or is a yoga class more likely to draw you out of bed vs. an hour on the elliptical?

So how can you make this year’s resolutions happen? Start today by writing that new story. The first and best thing you can do is to set SMART goals around your fitness (and other) resolutions. SMART goals are Specific, Measureable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-bound. So rather than resolve “to exercise more this year,” try on one of these SMART-er resolutions:

·      I will walk three days a week during the month of January.

·      I will sign up for that Pilates session by the end of this week.

·      Today, I will ask Anne if she can meet me at the gym on Fridays.

These resolutions sound very doable, yes? And far less daunting than feeling compelled to visit the gym every day when you really don’t want to. Remember, a brief, brisk walk is far better than skipping a workout all together. Just get moving! Find something you like to do (belly dancing? rock climbing?) and you will be far more likely to keep doing it.

And while you are at it, add a fun resolution to your list, such as seeing friends more often or treating yourself to a massage when you reach a goal.

Be well.

What Fills Your Cup?

My coaching instructor posed that question in a recent class. It seems like a pretty simple exercise – to just think about things that make me happy and what activities energize and recharge me. It was an easy list to compile, that’s for sure. It was lovely to think about being curled up on the couch by a fire absorbed in a great book, going for long walks on the beach, or having a glass of wine at sunset surrounded by friends and family. 

When I started to think about how often these things actually happen, I came crashing back to reality. While my husband and I are successfully made it through the “weeds” of parenting (how I lovingly refer to the baby and toddler years), we find ourselves in a wonderfully challenging new spot – having a tween and an almost-tween who are fully consumed with challenging schoolwork, multiple sports, Scouts, friends, and more. We find ourselves often “dividing and conquering” the carpooling, homework helping, and volunteering while trying to maintain our jobs, health, and household. And I find myself holding my Iphone far more than any book these days.

So needless to say, there is not a lot of “cup filling” going on at the moment. I feel like I spend my days racing between jobs and various kid commitments. And while I truly love all the different aspects of my life, my time to recharge has gotten squeezed to almost nothing.

As with any goal, it can be daunting to think about starting, as the end result can seem so far away (likely, my toes will not hit the sand until next summer). However, perhaps there are some things I can do now to work towards this goal in a different way. For example, I can take more walks along our beautiful Potomac, email that group of friends I have been missing to meet up for a glass of wine, or get on Goodreads to find my next great book.

So, set three small achievable goals you can work on in the next week to fill your cup. Write them down (with a deadline) and makes notes on your progress. Maybe it is just blocking the time on your calendar for yourself (and saying “no” when you are asked to do something in that time). Or maybe schedule a sitter for a lunch date with your husband. Start with baby steps, as small changes are what eventually lead to great ones.

Be well.